I think I've had my breaking point when it comes to the opposite sex. I think that I am just going to call it quits for a while and just take it easy. I know that sometimes a woman must do what she needs to, to get what she wants but I think that there needs to be a happy medium when it comes to certain things.
I have been trying to get myself out of the friend zone with the guy that I am interested in. I have been making the conscious effort to actually talk to him and to see if he wants to be more than just friends, but it seems that now I am the persuer instead of the persuee.. I don't like to chase men, I don't think that I need to. I think I've dropped enough hints and "dimes" for him to know that I am interested in taking this farther than just the friend roll.. But I think that he is either ignoring me or he is really dense which would be a turn off for me anyway.
I called mr. "Friend Zone" and asked him out to dinner. In hopes that this would open the doors of communication. I was thinking that maybe if I asked him out on a date that he'd see that I was looking to step outside of the "Friend Zone" box and maybe start something. I feel like I'm the man in this but I don't care. I wanted this guy to know that I was interested so I'm going to put myself out there.
Me: Hey you, whats up? How was your day?
Him: Eh, long boring day, you know how it goes
Me: Um, so I wanted to know if you weren't busy on Friday (the 27th), maybe we could go out and grab some eats?
Him: Yeah, that sounds good. You know where you'd wanna go?
Me: Uh, yeah there's this cool place in Williamsburg called Sea, wanna go there
Him: Yeah, sounds good.
Me: So Friday it is?
Him: Yeah, sounds good.
That happened a week ago, and homeboy has yet to call me back! Ok, I know I sound a bit much but I was hoping that he'd call me back to confirm our date or whatever. Though its the beginning of the week I think he'd want to make sure that the plans were still on. I don't like this feeling. I feel like I have lost all control of myself. As a woman who sometimes, ( I used the word sometimes very loosely) has composure I'm trying not to call him and ask him whats up. The rational side of me says that "Hey he remembered and is just going to wait it out till Friday and meet to go out." Then, there is the irrational side of me that says, " Woman if you don't call him and see if he is dating some next chick and you make an ass out yourself thinking that he remembered Friday." UGH, I hate this up and down roller coaster that I have to deal with when dating.
Living in NY is not easy. The men here are so hard to come by. Ok, let me rephrase that, the GOOD MEN are hard to come by. I usually meet the guys that I have no interest in. The ones that are unmotivated, uncoordinated, and unreliable... ALL UNATTRACTIVE! You really don't run into well spoken, well dressed, ambitious young men who aren't out to just screw you every chance they get, in NY. I think this guy suits my character. He's ambitious, and goal oriented, and most importantly he's GOD FEARING... I love a man who knows the WORD! But, again I am placed in the FRIEND ZONE, because of my love for sports and anything that is usually male dominated! I don't want to call him, I REFUSE to call him. He knows that I asked him out so I am thinking (yes I know its assuming, but I really don't want to show that I am making an ass out of myself) that he maybe waiting for me to call him back with confirmation of our "pseudo-date." Why can't he call me? Why can't he make sure that its still on?
I'm beginning to think that this was not a good idea, and that I am just wasting my time and that I should just move on with myself and not worry.
AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! (ok, I feel better)